I believe we are all here to assist one another in reaching a higher state of self. I hope there is at least one person who benefits from my own journey in recovering through creative process.
February 11, 2020: Traumatic brain injury (a total reset of all internal workings)
March 19, 2020: First day of stay-at-home order due to pandemic
May 3 – June 14, 2020: Start healing through a photo essay project, solo walks in the cemetery
Did you know nerve endings can regenerate one millimeter every day. Baby steps, actually micro steps in recovering after a traumatic brain injury. The damage can cause an actual fugue state, resulting in confussion and disassociation from brain and body. In my case, there were months of amnesia, relearning how to hear, see, walk, think and process absolutely everything. But to everyone I interacted with I seemed “normal”. The brain is a marvelous, self-functioning system where the main job is to keep you alive. Unfortunately, when your brain is damaged you have no control or guidance as to how this self-preservation manifests. All of this and more happened to me at the beginning of a pandemic.
Desparately wanting to heal faster, yet still disassociated from reality. Thinking, is everything a dream? Am I dead or reborn? What is real? Three months into my recovery, the weather got nicer and a local cemetery seemed like a safe place to be outside alone. The cemetery walks became a process of exercising my body, mind and soul. Walk outside, take photos, jot down thoughts about what I am seeing and then repeat. I researched fauna I found along the way to make my words more poignant. Mementos, captured in several tiny photo poems.
The walks were my creative escape, my rebirth, my reflection and my meditation time. A calm safe haven in a world on fire. All photo essays were created in my third month a severe trau- matic brain injury during the worst global pandemic seen in many lifetimes. I do not recall most of my time then, but my brain’s nerve endings have grown and healed. I have learned healing takes time, healing takes a team and solitude should be left for the dead.
Thank you to all the people who are there to help me heal and grow.
Rose Sol
2 Responses
What a wonderful collage of photographs and poetic verses. Thank you for making this available to everyone. It’s beautiful.
These are beautiful, just like the creator!